How You Can’t Do That On Television Changed Kids’ Television

By Emily Carney

Like many kids, I was obsessed with Monty Python’s Flying Circus growing up. Python was featured on America’s Public Broadcasting Service (PBS), usually sandwiched between Doctor Who (with Tom Baker!) and a terrible British sitcom called ‘Allo ‘Allo. It had a great classically-rooted theme song, and was completely hilarious.

It should be explicitly stated, however, that Python was not, in any way, shape, or form, a kids’ TV show. It presented a lot of adult situations (“I LIKE TITS!” is actually a quote by Terry Jones, the Welsh member of the troupe). I would NEVER let my nephew and niece watch Python, as I don’t want to be collared for child abuse. So, when my parents were actually watching me, I’d switch the channel to Nickelodeon (a relatively new cable offering at the time) and watch the Canadian TV show, You Can’t Do That On Television. YCDTOT at its best was the preteen version of Python, and possessed its own brand of surreal, controversial humor. It also had a great attention-getting classical theme song.

YCDTOT started as a regional TV show in Ottawa in 1979; within two years the show became syndicated throughout Canada and the US. Most viewers of YCDTOT are familiar with the basic premise of the show. The “host” was the brunette, constantly embattled Christine McGlade (or “Moose”). Christine is basically trolled by some girl named Lisa and some punk kid named Alasdair, who eventually became the show’s full-time host when Christine left the show in 1986. At some point in the mid-1980s the pop singer Alanis Morissette starred on the show, although by that point viewership had decreased.

All of the kids on the show are trolled by Les Lye, a versatile Canadian character actor who played most of the adult male authority figures on the show. Les played (not all at once . . .) a rather gross chef named “Barth,” a wholly inept TV cameraman named Ross, the firing squad leader El Capitano (who regularly slaughtered the kids on the show via the firing squad . . . remember, this was before political correctness existed), and a revolving cast of generally revolting adult figures.

It is fairly well known that whenever the kids said the words “I don’t know,” they would be covered with green slime. It is believed the green slime was actually oatmeal dyed with neon green food coloring, but of course it looked like straight-up boogers. The kids were also doused with water on a fairly regular basis. I guess the show’s creators figured out that sadistic kids watching this show at home really thought those kinds of torturous things were funny in the 1980s, and they were, unfortunately, correct.

YCDTOT was not without controversy, as two of its episodes were banned because of their saucy content. The two verboten episodes were called “Adoption” and “Divorce.” You can probably guess why, without me explaining it to you, why these episodes were banned. By 1984, YCDTOT was venturing into almost adult territory with its humor, which is probably why the show came back in 1986 with a new, younger cast and a slightly different format. The jokes became sillier and less intelligent and cutting; young viewers slowly became disinterested.

By the late 1980s, the glory days of YCDTOT were over; many bad kids like myself who would sneak peeks at Python had graduated to much worse things such as Married With Children (also not a kids’ show in the least). However, YCDTOT left resonances. It paved the way for future kids’ shows such as Phineas And Ferb in the sense that it straddled the thin line between adult black comedy and sheer childlike goofiness. The “classic” episodes of YCDTOT haven’t aged much, and remain pretty amusing to this day. My nephew and niece can watch this show freely, and giggle away without guilt.

Entire episodes and other information about You Can’t Do That On Television can be found at The Slime Society fansite.