Romance Schmomance
Published on January 30th, 2008 in: Feminism, Issues, Movies, Over the Gadfly's Nest | 
Gone with the Wind Cookie Jar
There are obvious allusions to incest in this story as well as a father’s death wish for his young daughter and this is nothing short of terrifying. Gone with the Wind says that men want their wives to behave like possessions and when these men don’t get what they want they force their women until someone dies. People aren’t so bright sometimes.
I would like to believe in the Romantic notions that I have always searched for, not a hotel room with a fireplace, a bear skin rug, or champagne with candlelight. I want the unequivocal and deeply ingrained love of an equal. Someone who reciprocates my intelligence, makes me funnier, and loves being with me. I do not want Britney Spears or a new iPod for X-mas. I do not want a violently-tempered relationship.
There are many other stories in the world: I can become the Princess under a spell of inaction. One day a rich Prince, on a white horse, could kill a dragon for me or send a Witch into the third dimension of hell! Then there will be wedding and honeymoon plans to be made and I will rule a kingdom. Mine is an “okay” way to find love, but I don’t look as good as some of those Princesses in their Princess clothes.
I am very worried about Hollywood and how stereotypes have contributed to the global tragedy that we are experiencing today. Maybe I am alone in my need for the lost, natural world. I believe that we will see a lot of ragged fur coats, oily feathers, and muddied fur boots in our incumbent toxic swamp. By now, we should seen most of our Fashion and Hollywood trends buried in empty water bottles. What is cool and trendy? (Tu-Pac’s remix of “Snowbird”) What is scary? (Death-texting victims with spooky ringtones) What is Romantic? (Rich teenagers going to Malibu for the summer) All of the greedy pill-pushers really want the same thing—my money.
Working in the business of Graphic Design it’s not hard to understand how all of this mayhem happens. Seeing my peers rave about the newest interactive telephone, I have to wonder: does anyone really think these things are cool? It’s obvious that trendsters possess the very traits that make the toy-developers’ mouths water. I am one of those many boobs who push the advanced sales of new products into the millions of dollars on the whiff of product development.
But back to my Romantic notions: is the amount of crying in a film directly proportional to the amount of Romance? Some people find it endearing to see their partner cry. What about the tear-fest of The Bridges of Madison County? By the same rationale The Joy Luck Club is just as Romantic.
Clarence + Alabama =
True Romance
My personal favorite twisted romantic message is that of the film True Romance where the main characters meet and fall in love. The girl is a gorgeous prostitute who, cutely enough, has only ever worked one other prostitution job before a greasy Christian Slater shows up to whisk her away into a tangled shock of dirt-bags and drug addicts.
There are many wars to be fought in the sensible Romantic relationship. It’s quite easy to see that Romance does not come without incredible hardship: war, multiple divorces, death, loss of sanity, someone getting fat, or one person losing their memory. I’m still wondering where it all went wrong. What of the small wars like “who gets to do the dishes after no one has done them for three days” or “I really wish that you would start to put your clothes in the hamper, so I will also throw mine around the house”? This Romance is always better than beating up petty thugs, sending your lover into the middle of a Civil War to fend for herself, or being ditched by the same woman twice.
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One Response to “Romance Schmomance”
September 1st, 2009 at 8:25 am
“There are obvious allusions to incest in this story as well as a father’s death wish for his young daughter and this is nothing short of terrifying”
– I don’t see where you getting this from?
Gone With the Wind is a story about human nature set against the back drop of catastrophic background. There is so much truth to the four major characters. It is not a romance, it is a story about struggle, survival, selfishness, and the dark side of human nature. Rhett is not a dashing hero but a bitter, narcissistic, almost self destructive individual. Scarlet is spoiled and stubborn. Ashley is a weak character and not so different from Rhett in many ways. I strongly recommend you read the book.
Secondly, Casablanca is too a story about human nature at a time of catastrophe. It is about moral choices and actions. Right and wrong, personal feelings against a greater cause. Rick and Ilsa are a passionate couple and there is a romance there. But it probably would be not a lasting romance. Whereas Victor represents an idealistic form of man and Ilsa may have once loved him but now she respects him and feels a warm companionship but not the same passion she feels for Rick. Of course, that sort of passion never lasts.
Anyway, the most interesting character of the whole film may be Louis. He spends most of the film as a seemingly cynical, self serving bastard completely without morals. But both he and Rick make a decision to fight for something larger than themselves at the end of the film for their own reasons.
You are right, neither movie should be held up as an ideal of love, but then they were never meant to be a love story anymore than Rome and Juliet is a love story. Glad to see not all women ate enamored by jerks.
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