By Brendan Ross
4:00 a.m. A payphone rings outside of an all-night diner in L.A. Our protagonist warily answers it, opening up the line to a frantic missile silo employee lamenting about imminent nuclear destruction set to hit in 70 minutes. Gunshot sounds are heard in the background. A man’s voice takes over the phone.
“Forget everything you’ve just heard and go back to sleep”
This ominously sets the scene for the remaining 70-minute run time of Miracle Mile. The previous 20 minutes, however, set a much different tone.
By Brendan Ross
The year is 2017 (30 years in the future) and due to some economic turmoil, the United States has essentially turned into a sparsely populated wasteland. Businessman Sam Treadwell (David Andrews), who lives in one of the few remaining civilized communities, comes home after a hard day of businessman work to his “Cherry 2000” (Pamela Gidley), a female love robot. She already has dinner ready for him, and after a healthy dose of preprogrammed ego catering words they are ready to make love. On the kitchen floor. While the future dishwasher runs in overdrive covering the floors, counters, and both of them with soapsuds. Unfortunately, even in the distant future of 2017 electronic water damage still has not been eradicated and Cherry short circuits.
Most people have a movie they only show to certain people, a movie so strange or weird that you would rather everyone not know you like it. In some cases, that movie is a test. The thought process is: if I show you this movie, and you still like me, then we can be friends. If you like me and the movie, then we can get married.
The year is 2000, and the 72nd annual Academy Awards are in full swing. It’s a heavy year for the Best Actress category, with Hilary Swank, Annette Bening, Janet McTeer, and Julianne Moore all in contention for the golden stature. Meryl Streep is nominated too, for a little movie called Music of the Heart. It’s one of those roles Streep has made a career of, playing strong Caucasian women who overcome the odds and make a huge difference in the lives of others, usually not Caucasians. Streep being at the Oscars isn’t a surprise. The thing different about this picture is the director of Music of the Heart, who is not nominated for an award.
His name is Wes Craven.
Though it is incredibly wrenching, the documentary I’ll Be Me is such an important film. By allowing filmmaker James Keach unbridled access to himself and his family, Glen Campbell’s battle with Alzheimer’s disease is starkly delineated, from diagnosis to decline. It’s intimate and human and so hard to watch.
The Salvation is a Western. It’s not a comedy western, it’s not a horror western, and it’s not a science fiction western: it’s just a Western. It’s about revenge and it stars Mads Mikkelsen, Eva Green, and Jeffrey Dean Morgan. It’s also outstanding.
Towards the beginning of La Grande Bouffe one of the characters states, “Gentlemen, we are not here to have a vulgar orgy.” It is a droll bit of dialogue eventually revealed to be alarmingly ironic.
It’s been a while since we’ve seen a Noomi Rapace movie in theaters. She co-starred in last year’s excellent The Drop with Tom Hardy, while another film with Hardy, Child 44, seemed to come and go with nary a whisper, unless you count the dreadful 24 percent rating on Rotten Tomatoes.
Winona Ryder has reportedly confirmed that Beetlejuice 2, the sequel no one has been asking for, is actually happening. Director Tim Burton and the old bio-exorcist himself, Michael Keaton, are also on board for the film.
Beetlejuice came out in 1988. That’s 27 years ago.
You’ve seen it before and there’s no sense in denying it. Some things just shouldn’t be paired up. Maybe there’s a couple whose relationship dynamic seems odd and impenetrable. Perhaps someone likes to do strange things with their food. I, for example, put peanut butter on hot dogs. My wife is displeased with this choice.
These examples of poor matching can be applied to the horror film, Inner Demons, a found-footage film which shouldn’t be a found-footage film.