Rock ‘n’ Roll High School 30th Anniversary Special Edition

By Less Lee Moore

Although for many, The Ramones represent the birth of the US punk scene in the ’70s, I was only about three years old when the band first formed in 1974. For me, The Ramones were the four weird-looking, tall dudes who kept popping up in promos for MTV in 1981. Most of the videos in the early days of MTV were fairly bizarre; at that point the channel would show any videos they could and the shift to glamorous, new wave pretty boys had not yet occurred. However, even amongst Loverboy, Meatloaf, Split Enz, and The Tubes, The Ramones looked pretty damn strange.

I didn’t see Rock ‘n’ Roll High School until a few years later, when I’d officially hit my own teenage years. I remember feeling confused and vaguely uncomfortable, not totally grasping why it was supposed to be so great. The news of the upcoming release of a 30th Anniversary Special Edition made me curious to see how the film as aged. Would it be funny? Would it be relevant?

Thankfully, the answer to both questions is, “YES.”

To be fair, Rock ‘n’ Roll High School begins like a lot of movies of the time: fairly slow in pace, corny, and awkward. Things pick up quickly once The Ramones themselves show up, in the back of a convertible, playing their instruments with no amps, while Joey Ramone gnaws on a chicken leg before tossing it into the street.

The premise of the film is simple and familiar: the squares want to crush the free spirited teens and their evil rock and roll music. Unlike Footloose, however, Rock ‘n’ Roll High School changes the formula with camp and ironic humor. . . and of course, a truly amazing soundtrack.

Naturally, The Ramones are at the center of it all with 13 songs, several of which are performed live. Devo, Alice Cooper, The MC5, The Paley Brothers, Nick Lowe, and even Brian Eno are all featured in the soundtrack.

P.J. Soles plays Riff Randell, who rather embarrassingly introduces herself as “a rock and roller” but declares she’s The Ramones’ biggest fan. She’s pitted against Mary Woronov as Miss Togar, a sort of prison-warden-turned-high-school-principal, who does not stand for such shenanigans. She would be annoying if she didn’t seem like a secret dominatrix (and if her history with Warhol’s Factory wasn’t amusingly ironic). She conducts experiments to prove how dangerous The Ramones’ music is by using it to blow up white lab mice, a task which she enjoys perhaps a bit too much.

We also have Clint Howard as Eaglebauer, a kind of quasi-pimp, who, from his office in the school bathroom, attempts to hook dorky football player Tom Roberts (Vincent Van Patten) up with Riff as well as Riff’s best friend Kate Rambeau (Dey Young) and her enormous plastic eyeglasses. In truth, I could do without the creepy scenes where Eaglebauer tries to teach Tom and Kate how to make out by using a blow up doll, but thankfully they don’t linger too long.

The whole movie is completely implausible and ridiculous, but I think it’s supposed to be that way. What makes Rock ‘n’ Roll High School special is not just the hilarity of positing The Ramones as some sort of sexy, punk version of The Beatles, but the way in which, despite the fact that she looks at least as old as The Ramones themselves and is not that great of an actress, Riff seems so genuine in her fandom. Not only does she camp out for tickets, she writes songs for the band, dismissing alleged superfan Angel Dust as a “groupie,” and best of all, she plunks down a grand of her own money to buy 100 concert tickets for her friends.

At one point, in order to convince her friends of the urgency of skipping school to camp out for Ramones tickets, Riff drawls, “Ten years from now no one will ever care if you’ve ever even been to high school!” Cheesy, yes. But also awesome. And true.

Even The Ramones get to “act” a little with some choice dialogue and a peculiar fantasy/daydream sequence where Joey shows up in Riff’s bedroom while she’s hanging out in her Capezio leotard and tights, getting stoned. The concert footage of The Ramones is equally weird but fantastic, complete with a giant white mouse being turned away at the door of the venue until the bouncer discovers he has headphones (presumably the results of the experiments conducted by Miss Togar have been discovered by the locals).

Riff’s attempts to turn all of Vince Lombardi High School into a Ramones Fan Club sees its greatest success with Mr. McGree, the music teacher (Paul Bartel) who seems incredibly unhip until he takes a hit off a hookah and starts rocking out with the white mouse in the audience at the concert. All the scenes of Bartel post-Ramonesing make me laugh so hard it hurts. He’s just such a goofball, I cannot help but love him, particularly when, during a standoff between the authorities and the Ramones contingent, Miss Togar mentions The Ramones and Bartel just bursts into applause and an enthusiastic “YAY!”

Eventually, rock and roll wins out: Riff transforms the school into Rock ‘n’ Roll High School, The Ramones show up and anoint her an honorary Ramone, the students go crazy and trash the place, and things get out of hand. I won’t spoil the ending for you, but I will say that it involves fire and explosions.

All in all, the movie is a deliriously enjoyable piece of cinematic candy. To quote Mr. McGree, The Ramones are “The Beethovens of our time.” It’s hard to believe we now live in a world in which three of those Beethovens—Joey, Johnny, and Dee Dee—are no longer with us, but Rock ‘n’ Roll High School will live on forever.

Rock ‘n’ Roll High School 30th Anniversary Special Edition was released by Shout! Factory on May 4 and contains a 16-page booklet of interviews with cast and crew plus a smorgasbord of extras, including three audio commentary tracks, lots of interviews with various members of the cast and crew, and Marky Ramone, audio outtakes from the concert performances, and much more.