Top Five Ideas For Life After The Swineflu Apocalypse (As Gleaned From ’80s Music Videos)

Published on May 30th, 2009 in: Issues, Listicles, Music, Retrovirus, Top Five Lists, Video |

By Hanna

1. In the future, David Bowie will flirt with black men and we will do experimental dance. ALL DAY.

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David Bowie, “Time Will Crawl” (1987)


2. We will be gay space cowboys who wear too much rouge and also colored PVC.

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Adam Ant, “Apollo 9” (1985)

Then we’ll all move to a new earth built in the sky! And have buttons that activate Marco.

3. We will live in homo-erotic gangs based on the color of our Doctor Martens and get ambushed by rival gangs of little boys.

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King, “Love And Pride” (1984)

4. The future: it’s all about blocky computer graphics, Mike Oldfield wearing a yellow vest while emoting in front of fireworks, and Aled Jones and Anita Hegerland floating in space.

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Mike Oldfield, “Pictures In The Dark” (1985)

5. In the future, everyone will live on paper rubbish tips.

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The Police, “Synchronicity II” (1983)

And Sting will have no eyebrows left.

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